It is amazing how modern young parents are able, educated and aware, in their opinion, to accuse their own parents of upbringing the child, adding wings, caring for self-esteem. It’s admirable if we approach more consciously the raising of children, along with the trend of closeness parenting. Children are benefiting and we are the winners. We build a solid bond for years, for the time when our children will no longer need us!
The Polish pedagogue, Janusz Korczak was a writer, a doctor and a social activist. He is known also for having refused to save his life 3 times. The first incident took place when he refused to emigrate to Palestine, before the occupation of Poland, in order not to leave the orphanage on the eve of terrible events. The second incident happened when he refused to flee the Warsaw ghetto. The third time happened when all the occupants of the orphanage were on the train and an officer approached one of the carriages and asked:
“Did you write ‘King Matthew First’?” He also added that he has read his book when he was a child and that he appreciated the book very much. Then he said to Janusz that he was free to go away wherever he wanted.
“But what about the children?”, Janusz asked.
“The children will rest on the train. But you can leave.”
“You’re wrong. I cannot. Not all people are bastards”, Janusz said.
None of the witnesses to this conversation have survived. The same way there are no witnesses left about the fact that on his way to Treblinka Korczak told many stories to the children in order to distract them from bad thoughts and ease their mood on the way to the terrible place they were being taken.
JANUSZ KORCZAK has lived in this world and has created earlier than our parents have lived. He arranged the matters of upbringing and approaching children so beautifully, succinctly and in a way, hardly anyone has managed to beat him so far. And you could read dozens of guidebooks, watch tones of reports, participate every evening in a new webinar on improving your approach to your own child.
Would that be enough? It would be indeed enough to consciously read and finally get to apply these beautiful sounding 10 commandments of Janusz Korczak about how to treat a child.
Mindsetbooster reminds you of this precious heritage to the world. Find their second-bottom by translating it into life, your everyday parent reality, so far from the ideal, so that you’ ll manage in the end to really “be a parent”, “a good educator who does not force but releases, does not pull but raises, does not knead but shapes, does not dictate but teaches, does not demand and asks …”!
1. Don’t expect your child to be like you, or the way you want him to be. Help him become himself.
2. Don’t ask your child to pay for everything you’ve done for him. You gave him life, how would he repay you? He will give life to someone else, and this is an irreversible law of gratitude.
3. Do not show your dissatisfaction with your own child, so as not to eat your bitterness in old age. For what you sow you will reap.
4. Do not address the problems of the child with superiority. Life is offered to every one according to their strengths, be sure, life can be difficult for him, no less than for you, maybe even more because he has no experience.
5. Don’t humiliate him!
6. Remember, the most important meetings are meetings with our children. Give it maximum attention. You never know who you may meet in your own child.
7. Don’t bother if you can’t do everything for your child, but remember: not enough has been done for the child if everything possible has not been done.
8. The child is not a tyrant, who monitors your whole life, not just flesh and blood. It is the precious cup that life has given you to preserve and develop the creative fire in it. This unlimited love of the mother and father to whom he will grow not “ours” or “my” child, but a soul.
9. Learn to love a foreign child. Never behave with a stranger as you would not want others to behave with your own child.
10. Love your child in any situation – untalented, unlucky, adult. Talk to him, be happy because the baby is a celebration that is still going on in your life.